Good Man #1: Alex Williams

In my post on 4/22/10, "I only date Black men. It's my prerogative!" I stated that I would start spotlighting good black men on my blog. This month I’m putting my bro Alex Williams on blast. I’m a little biased about him being a good guy since I've known him practically all his life, but I'm not the only one who sees how special he is, so it must be the real thing.

I knew that I wanted to interview Alex when I had the idea, and he immediately said yes without hesitation. I kept trying to plan a time for us to meet and have the interview, but it never seemed to work out. One day on the humble Alex calls Steph to go to breakfast and I'm sitting in the car relishing in the great workout week I had. She asked me to go and my thighs made me shake my head NO, but then Alex gets in my ear with the peer pressure and forced me kicking and screaming to eat delicious french toast and BACON!! (Side note: Every time we said the word bacon, we applauded LMBO). Anyway, I guess some of the best conversations and interactions with folks can’t be planned because this time spent with my sis and brother from another mother was PRICELESS…

Sweet P: Tell me 3 things about you that even your closest friends don’t know.

Alex: Hmmm....(5 minutes later)...Hmmm....Can you come back to that one?

Sweet P: Sure, but understand there are no passes...You can’t run from me. (Winks) Okay so moving on...Can you tell me one quality about yourself that you don’t like?

Alex: (After chewing BACON!!...Applause) I can be very selfish, but I have a heart for being self-less, but it has to be very intentional with me. It’s not a characteristic that I just have. I see people who are very giving. Who are very loving and it’s with ease that they can serve people. For me, I have to consciously decide to be a nice person. (I give the side eye. Alex laughs) I have a heart for serving the poor and serving God’s Kingdom, but it’s a clearly intentional thing for me to make a decision to choose to be that way. It’s not an innate drive that I have, but I choose to be Christ-like and Christ-minded in my giving back and service.

Sweet P: I bet you may be giving too much credit to those folks you think are “self-less.” They may be just as selfish as you are, but don’t admit it. In my opinion, I think you may be too hard on yourself. It takes a special person to be able to give to others when they don’t feel like it. Doesn't matter what moves you or pushes you to act, the fact remains that you choose to do it. Some don’t. (Kanye shrug) Okay, so now on to something juicier that inquiring minds want to know...Tell me three attractive traits about a woman outside of appearance.

Alex: (With no hesitation) Alright #1 is humor. I love to laugh and I love a woman who can just be silly and let go sometimes and not be so serious all the time. And also who can take my silly quirks cuz I’m a silly dude.

Sweet P: You are!! (Loud laughter)

Alex: Not the AMEN corner. (Laughs) You were like, “Yes, yes, he is!” (Laughs) I love to laugh and she has to be able to laugh also. Secondly, driven. Someone who is ambitious and has goals in life and are making steps and strides to achieve those goals. And I would be just as supportive of her and would hope she would be with me in my pursuit of music.

Sweet P: It’s funny you say driven because there are a lot of people who see this as a negative quality for a woman.

Alex: Not at all! Matter of fact, she can make so much more money than me, and I could care less!

Sweet P: (High 5-ing) Love that!

Alex: I want someone who has their own thing going on and we can bring both our worlds together and make it work. That’s what I’m talkin’ bout! And #3, she has to love family. I have an extended family that I love to hang around and I would hope that she would have the same and really be about family coming first. After God, but before career and everything else.

Sweet P: Well which of those three is a deal breaker for you? She has these two but, not this and it’s a WRAP!

Alex: Honestly, humor. If we can’t laugh together…cuz we are gonna have to laugh through some situations. There are going to be times when we may not be financially straight or the kids are acting crazy. We gotta be able to laugh.

Sweet P: Laughter is good for the soul...She sounds like an amazing woman...She sounds like me. (Madea smile) Now, I think I know the answer to the next question, but I’ve never asked you before, so...What is the one moment in your life that shaped you into the man you are today?

Alex: When my mother died. That changed my whole outlook on life. It changed my perception on things. Before she passed, it was all about parents just want you to get your degree and if you do that you get your good government job and blah blah blah, but my mother had some dreams and goals that weren’t met prior to her passing and it opened my eyes to want to live a life that I feel is satisfactory for me. A life that I feel has purpose and that I was able to pursue and chase the dreams that I want. Whether it comes to fruition or not, at least I can be happy with the fact that I did try. Not to negate education because you know I didn't finish school, but at the same time school was no longer Priority #1--it was living a purposeful life. And for some you need school to do it and for some you don’t necessarily need it. I think education is important and all that good stuff, but for me I think God had a different path, and so again that situation just literally opened my eyes to a whole new way of thinking of things.

Sweet P: Woo woo woo...Ok now back to my first question. Can you NOW tell me 3 things about you that even your closest friends don’t know?

Alex: Okay three things. I know most artists get nervous before they perform, but I’m definitely nervous and I'm not one of those people who tremble. I just get a shortness of breath and sometimes it’s kinda hard and I really have to focus on my breathing when I’m performing so I don’t pass out.

Sweet P: (Laughing, but alarmed)

Alex: I’m joking. I’m joking, but that's one most people probably don’t know about me. I’ve seen myself perform and I don’t look nervous, but I really am.

Sweet P: You don’t look it at all. You would never know. Interesting...

Alex: #2 would be, yeah, I have the Simpson’s Sings the Blues record and I still listen to it. “Do the Bartman,” “Nothing but Trouble,” yeah, I still listen to that so...I’m not ashamed of my game…

Sweet P: (Laughing hysterically...but Alex is so serious)

Alex: And the third one is that I always eat my desert before my meal.

Sweet P: Why do you do that?

Alex: I don’t know. Having something sweet after eating a salty meal…I don’t like that. I like sweet then salty.

Sweet P: Okay cool. Now for my final question. I get tired of answering this, so now I will put someone else on the hot seat. Why do you think you’re single?

Alex: Cuz the woman I want don’t want me. (Looking sad while eating a second helping of BACON!!...Applause)

Sweet P: (Laughing) You sound a little bitter there.

Steflova: (Adding her 2 cents) Tell ‘em how you really feel son! Tell ‘em how you really feel.

Alex: Beyonce just won’t return my calls… No, I’m kidding.

Sweet P & Steflova: (Laughing really hard)

Alex: Are you still recording?

Sweet P: Yuup! ROTFLMBO!!

Alex: (Now trying to take me seriously) I don’t know. I just haven’t found that combination. I’m not looking for perfection, but with the divorce rate being almost 60%, I definitely want somebody who has some major qualities that I desire. I can work through some stuff, but I am not willing to compromise. I would like to enjoy a long-lasting marriage, a healthy marriage, a loving marriage, and it’s a process to find that person.

Told you he was one of the good guys... ;-)

Alex is currently working on a gospel CD that is going to be AMAZING, so please support him in his efforts. To learn more about Alex and get information on how you can purchase his new single, “Everybody Needs a Hero,” please visit http://awmusiconline.com/.