It’s only 2 more days until my birthday and it has me thinking about my wish list for this year. That's the thing about birthdays; you think back to this time last year and evaluate how far you've come, how far you have left to go and the relationships around you.
I went to brunch yesterday with my sister and Bro-law. I love these two people not because I have to, but because of who they both are and what they have been to me--I have no other choice. As we sat talking about the important things in life, I realized that some "friendships' in my life are dead--and have been dead for a long time.
There is no one good reason that these friendships are ailing. I suppose time either draws you closer to people or further apart. I feel that over my years I have been more of a friend to some folks then they have been to me. It’s hard to admit this out loud, but it’s true. I don’t know how to NOT be there for people. It’s a quality that adds to my character, but it’s also my weakness. Its draining when people take, take, take and don’t put back into you. My only hope is that I don’t get so used up that I have nothing left to give to someone one day. I can’t allow that to ever happen, so as I sit here reflecting on turning 25 again ;), I am also thinking about what friendships lift me up to be an even better person and which ones are bringing me down.
It’s time for a change…
*Sweet P*
In the words of Keyshia Cole.."Let it go!". Like I said yesterday, why is it that when we are in a bad relationship with a guy, we can break up? Why don't we treat friendships the same? If someone is constantly taking taking taking and not giving, then they need to get the boot. "But we've been best friends since high school," you say. Really? Just let it go. The relationship is dead. Like damaged hair, you need to trim it off so you can grow.
ReplyDeleteI agree with all the sentiments expressed. In fact yesterday I toyed with the idea of calling one of those 'dead weight' type friends, you know the type who you could speak to like twice a year and not feel it,(besides the fact that i dont think us guys make the same high emotional deposits into friendships like you ladies). Well I ignored that nagging feeling telling me to hang up before he answered...too late; he picked up and instantly reminded me why I too should've have kept my distance. However, as the conversation progressed from one cringeworthy fact to another, rather than think to myself as I have in the past 'why are you in my life again ?', I left the convo in high spirits. ..because as cynical as it sounds, some 'friends' actually DO remind you just how much you have grown by virtue of their 'stagnancy'. I agree cut 'em off !, but keep some around for your ego ;-) !
ReplyDeleteRandom, you are SO RIGHT!!! With some friends, its like looking at your former self and realizing how far you have come. Never thought about it like that. Some do serve a purpose as ego-boosters. Some need to get the boot for good!
ReplyDeleteI can't believe I'm quoting TLC but what about ur friends? Will they stand there ground? Will they let u down? If they fulfill those questions to your liking then cherish them because they're rare and worth there price in gold. But dead weight friends coat tail friends give them the boot. They r useless.
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