2 months and counting!!!

Well today the real countdown begins...just 2 more months until my BORN DAY! Each year I anxiously await the day God chose to breathe life into this vessel. I celebrate the gift no one on earth can give me...the gift of life. See I have lost some special people in my journey. I party for them. For some reason God saw fit to have them with Him and they did not get to see my age, so I cherish each year because its not promised to me--its given


I'm looking forward to April not only for the B-day, but for some warm weather and Easter. The change of the season, the resurrection of my Savior, the day of my birth...April is a month or rebirth and renewal every year. So...RIP Walter, Greg, Jarrod, D, Falia, Jesse, all my young friends I lost at Children's esp. Fred and Josh, and all the other angels that are near and dear to my heart and yours. Let's all celebrate together!


Please note: There is a B-day icon to the right of the screen. If you place the cursor over it, you will get my actual birth date...no way you can forget it now ;)


Peace and blessings...


*Sweet P*

I Learned My Lesson Fo' Sho'

First, please listen to this song with Alicia Keys and my ex-boyfriend John "I don't like Black women" Mayer. This song right here!!! Its like Alicia looked in my past and is telling my story! I know you can relate to this, male or female. My favorite line is, "My soul has returned so I call it a lesson learned."


This is a follow-up from my February 17, 2010 posting, "Today is National Drop That LOSER Day!!" Hope you all dropped those Losers. I didn't have to drop any this time, but there are some calls I have vowed to stop answering FOREVER!! Like she says in the song, "It's called the past cuz I'm gettin' past and I ain't nothin' like I was before. You ought to see me now." Yes!!! Lesson learned indeed. It's alright...It alright...


It's never too late to drop that fool from your life. Do it TODAY! It will change your life for the better. Let me know if you need some help. I am Queen of what I call the resignation e-mail/text. LMBO!!!!!


Have a wonderful weekend and do something fun! I'm having a movie date with my one and only tonight--ME ;)

Time to get my ASH in gear!!

Well it’s been a week since Ash Wednesday and I made it. This I decided to give up something that would truly draw me closer to God during this time of self-reflection. I'm giving up: NEGATIVITY in my thoughts, words, and actions. I know it sounds easy enough, but those who know me well understand that it’s my daily struggle. I complain about work, can't stand the metro and the inconsiderate people that ride it, I refuse to accept a simple compliment such as your hair looks nice today, I yell at the people on the road who act like they are driving bumper cars...I live my life grumbling about the little things and sometimes give off a funky attitude even though I'm in good spirits. It makes me unapproachable at times and hard to deal with. Whoa! Did I really just admit to that??
 
So here are some examples of behaviors that I will be working on for the next 40 days (well 32 days):

1. I will not go to the ybf.com to engage in celebrity gossip...that has not been too hard, so I guess it never really mattered so much to me.
2. I will refrain from cussing the people on the metro out in my head, smile and greet my fellow commuters and not roll my eyes when someone talks loud on their cell phone or blasts their music for the whole train to hear....this is a doozy for me, but listening to my iPod with my praise and worship playlist helps A LOT. It’s hard to have that frame of mind when you are thinking about how good GOD has been to you.
3. I will say thank you when someone pays me a compliment and not questions their intentions....I have not done well with this at all. Still in progress...
4. I will take each new day at work as a blessing and not become so wound up that it’s hard to come down once I have left the building....I am so proud to say that even in planning a 500+ attendee conference and working 12 hour days, I am in great spirits. I vow to have a good day on purpose. It's amazing how much control we really do have in how we feel.
5. I will not take on the problems of the world and try to fix them. I will not allow people to dump their issues in my lap to solve for them and I will not listen to someone do the same thing I used to do (moan and groan about nothingness). I will not have these gripe sessions with anyone at work, home, etc....this has been going well. I am working on changing the topics and pulling people out of the cloud. By the end of some conversations this week, we were laughing. One person forgot what she was complaining about in the first place.

So far so good. It’s only been a week, but I'm leaps and bounds away from where I used to be. I'm sleeping better, my skin looks radiant (yes, I can now see what you see), and at the end of the day I sing and skip to the metro (literally). Life is good and I plan to continue these practices after Lent.

Continue to be blessed…

*Sweet P*

Having a good day...

Today has been nice and quiet. I got to sleep in, catch up on movies and lounge around the house. Later I'm going to spend the evening with family for some fun times. The perfect Saturday!!

It was a long week! Work has been busy with the planning for my upcoming conference. It's funny how when you are put in a den of lions what skills you learn you never had. So many times I wanted to blog, but had to do a report or send some write-up to my design team. I realized that I love writing for pleasure and this blog has a special place in my heart. I also appreciate the kind words of encouragement I have received, especially the insight from the opposite sex that has helped open me up to "really listen" to what ya'll have to say. Surprisingly, you actually make sense sometimes. LOL! Who knew that this blog would be free therapy for me? I can finally stop talking long enough to hear someone else's viewpoint and...I'm not always right. Go figure!

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH!!!

Be on the lookout for the next blog, "Time to get my ASH in gear!!," that will discuss the Lenten promise I'm making over the next 40 days. It’s only been 4 days and I have the shakes already, but I just keep remembering the sign in my kitchen, "Faith makes things possible, not easy" and I'm confident that this struggle is necessary to making me an EVEN BETTER woman.

Be blessed folks and have a splendid weekend...

*Sweet P*

Today is National Drop That LOSER Day!!

Not sure if there is some cosmic interruption in the universe, but lately I have been hearing way too many stories of men not treating women with the respect that they deserve. I think having been out of a relationship for so long, I now know what I will tolerate and what makes me want to open up fire and blast his.....okay I'm back....woooosahhhh! See I have come to realize that people will do to you what you allow them too. Male and female vampires will take advantage of a situation as long as they are able to continue drawing blood. I used to hold a grudge against some of the no good creeps from the past, but to be honest, they only did what I let them. I ignored the signs of trickery, listened to the foolish excuses, and continued to take the calls that came days after the messages I left. I can't even be mad. If I had put my foot down and said NO MORE, then there would be none.

With that said, I have declared today "National Drop that Loser Day." What better way to commemorate this than on Ash Wednesday. As we are reminded today that we are dust and to dust we shall return, let us finally put to rest some of these relationships that are taking more from us rather than adding to our lives. Let us vow to love ourselves more than we love that man/woman. Let us honor ourselves with relationships that make us smile/laugh more than cry. Let us value ourselves enough to be with someone who respects us enough to be monogamous. Whew, I gotta do a dance on that one! I'm too good to share a man with another woman. I wish I knew back in my 20s what I know today, but I have no regrets for each thorn is a reminder of how far I have come. Lessons have been learned fo' sho'! Still learning some and still making mistakes, but I take ownership of it all and do not put blame on anyone.

So in honor of "National Drop That Loser Day," I ask that you stop accepting less than you deserve ladies and gentlemen!!!!!! Hold out for LOVE. "Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without-each-other love." -Carrie, "Sex and the City"

P.S. Shout out to all my WINNERS out there whose stories give me hope and remind me to never settle for crumbs. (I have a huge appetite and need a banquet!!) For you, its "National Hug Your Winner Day." :)

*Sweet P*

My Battle against the Bulge

Being snowed in for a week caused me to eat things I have not had in years. Just a bunch of junk. There was nothing to do but cook, eat, sleep, watch movies, eat some more, sleep more...day after day after day. I’m so disgusted with myself now. I tried to do a 10 minute exercise class on Comcast and FAILED! 10 minutes!!! I could not even do that. Sad. The next day my body hurt, still hurts, so something has to give TODAY! Before you know it all the snow will melt away and my rolls and dimples will be revealed. I won’t be able to hide behind the coats and scarves anymore. Spring, my birthday, summer, my birthday, sundresses, my brithday, bathing suits, etc. are all around the corner and it’s time for me to reclaim my sexy.

I am not one of those exercise nuts that loves the gym. I hate the place with a passion. I wish that there was another way to get my body right, but I have no choice but to go workout. I don’t enjoy sweating and breathing hard. It does not excite me, but I do enjoy putting on clothes that fit me. I don’t enjoy looking like I’m 5 months pregnant, but I do enjoy wearing a bikini. I need to start eating better and moving more.

Join me in making an effort to be healthier in 2010. We don’t have to go crazy and stop eating what we like or workout 7 days a week. Let’s start with small changes. Doing things we enjoy like dancing, riding a bike, or walking in the park. You don’t have to give up that favorite dessert, just eat in moderation. Reduce your portion sizes, stop eating late and going to sleep afterwards, limit your sugar intake, drink more water, and drink less alcohol. These small changes will, over time, show on the scale or in your waist size.

So are you ready to change your life for the better? I am, so…

OPERATION: Get My Sexy back is in full effect!!!!!!!

Am I a LOSER?

My sister thinks I'm a loser because I go to the movies by myself. Why do I have to be a loser? I've actually never really thought about it until today. I love movies. All kinds. To be honest, I enjoy going to the theater alone sometimes. I don't have to wait on someone's schedule to become available. I don't have to wonder who is going to drive and how we will get there. I don't have to share popcorn (I get to eat it all by myself). No one talks to me during the movie at the most inappropriate times. I can sit wherever I want because I only have to find a seat for 1 person.

Don't get me wrong I love the company of people, but after 30+ years of living, I know what makes me happy. I refuse to make choices based on my marital or dating status. If I want to go eat out and no one is free, I'm going alone. Last minute movie, I'm riding solo. Concert or play, hey not everyone likes what I like, ticket for 1 please. Right now, I have no man and no kids. That will not always be the case, so I promise to enjoy the freedom that being single affords me.

So when the Sis tells me, "No more movies by yourself in 2010 because its pitiful." I say, B&#%$, you don't know my life!!!! LMBO! No really, I know you just want me happy and now that you know I am hopefully you and everyone else will just leave be.

Happy Valentine's Day!!

Another year and yet no special Valentine to call my own. My sister, who is my forever valentine, gave me a sweet card and my nephew gave me the most beautiful card and PINK rose. So although I do not have a special man to call my own to spend this day with...The good thing is that I know that I am loved by so many, and most importantly God.

Happy Heart Day folks! I am off to treat myself to a good meal and a movie. Enjoy your day!

*Sweet P*

B&#%$, you don't know my life!!!!

I just called XM Radio to set up automatic payments and get one month free in the process. Here is how the call ended:

Operator: We are running a promo on a brand new XM Radio plug-in for cars. It is 90+ in the stores, but I will give it to you for 19.99.

Me: Ummm. No thanks. I already have an XM Radio in my car. (Duh?)

Operator: How about your husband?

Me: (rolling my eyes) I don't have one of those. (Wow, the nerve of this B&#%$!!!!)

Operator: (giggling) Oh OK. (B&#%$!!!!) Well what about your daughter?

Me: Nope! Don't have one of those either. (Please go straight to hell NOW!!!)

Operator: (giggling, I think even smirking) Well what about anyone else in your house?

Me: No it's JUST ME!!!!!

Operator: Well thanks for your continued service. Have a good day!


B&#%$!!!! It was good until I called you.

Ode to Maxwell (My Bed)

Baby, I did not want to leave you this morning.

Last night was amazing.

I could have stayed in your warm embrace all day long.

The way you hold me, the way you touch me…nothing and no one compares.

You are always there when I need you;

When I’m sick, when I need a shoulder to cry on.

No matter the time of the day...you cradle me to sleep.

You are always on my mind and I can’t wait to see you tonight.

I love you Maxwell ;)

I just had a revelation....

I have a HUGE problem trusting people.

It is hard for me to allow anyone to do anything for me. Growing up the only man in my life would disappointment me over and over again. Now as an adult I have been stripped of the "joy of anticipation" gene. I look forward to nothing. People get excited for me when huge events or trips are on the horizon and I can't enjoy it because in the back of my mind I expect that something will go wrong. This is why I have turned into this Miss Independent Monster. I do EVERYTHING for myself because I won't give someone the opportunity to disappointment me. I can't remember the last time I asked someone for a favor. I know that it's a sick way to live. I can't even ask someone for a dollar for the vending machine when I am craving a candy bar and don't have change. The irony is that I love to do things for other people and find joy in helping someone in need. Why can't I allow someone to do the same for me? I don't know, but I need to learn to open up and let go. I need to know that if someone says no or does not come through with something, I will be okay. I need to learn to trust people.

Sunday was my first test. I have a good friend (let's call him Prince) that I have known for ages who comes in and out of my life because he had more important things to do than be bothered with me. Just kidding! He just has not been able to climb over my wall that I have built up. He is more resilient than most men I have dealt with because he has stuck it out. Anyway, I was leaving for a work trip and was going to once again drive and park rather than ask for someone to pick me up. I come back home late and did not want to be a bother. Again, it’s just easier for me to just do me than wait on someone. Prince offered to drop me off and pick me up. I declined at first, but thought about it and it did make more sense. I have to admit that I had my backup plan ready because I did not expect him to come on time. He surprised me and was hella early AND parked and waited with me, which was nice and unexpected. Now this is a baby step. I have this guard up that annoys even me, so I can imagine how I make others around me feel. It’s time to strip myself of this armor and reveal the REAL ME.

Okay so now I have to do an exorcism on my jezebel spirit AND work on opening up to people. It’s the most difficult thing in my life. I mean even though Prince proved himself, I still have a backup plan for getting home when I return. Why can’t I just believe that he will pick me up like he said he would? I have been this way for 30+ years, so this will not change overnight. Please be patient with me.

Let the renovations begin…

*Sweet P*